This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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