Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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