i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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