We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Randomize
