what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
