I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
