The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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