Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
