tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Randomize
