Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
