Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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