hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
