i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
