If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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