Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
