community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
