Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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