Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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