first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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