I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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