haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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