The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize