we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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