the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
