I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
