she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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