whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
im holly from the hills drunk
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Randomize