Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Well I just put wine in my tea
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
