i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
