I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
