i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize