There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
