He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize