What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
