How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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