I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize