Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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