She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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