I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
