Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry klexis hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right

Fav 31 30395 1602
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday

Fav 12 4992 1243
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(612): View more from Minnesota

This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.

Fav 19 1467 3729
share tweet
(419): View more from Ohio

I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.

Fav 16 3013 1822
share tweet
(910): View more from North Carolina

He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.

Fav 3 3042 1302
share tweet
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.

Fav 18 4635 1388
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(603): View more from New Hampshire

You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"

Fav 2 3928 968
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(443): View more from Maryland

You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.

Fav 1 1009 558
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(786): View more from Florida

I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ

Fav 0 5 34
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT