Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You can't motorboat a personality
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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