she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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