I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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