I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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