Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
