We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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