she was so not down for the gang bang
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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