my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
