I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize