Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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