No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
