Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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